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Anti-Pickup Line

 

He: Did it hurt?
She: Did what hurt?
He: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because your face is really fucked up.

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7 Comments
 

- I'd like to call you. What's your number?
- It's in the phone book.

- But I don't know your name.
- That's in the phone book too.

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5 Comments
 

- Haven't I seen you someplace before?

- Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore.

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2 Comments
 

Male: I would die for you...

Female: Prove it

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3 Comments
 

- Your place or mine?

- Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine.

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2 Comments
 

Guy: What're you doing Friday night?

Girl: Not you.

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4 Comments
 

-I’m a photographer. I’ve been looking for a face like yours.

-I’m a plastic surgeon. I’ve been looking for a face like yours

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3 Comments
 

- If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.

- Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

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2 Comments
 

-Hi. Didn’t we go on a date once? Or was it twice?

-Must’ve been once. I never make the same mistake twice.

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2 Comments
 

- Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason

- Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!

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5 Comments
 

- So what do you do for a living?

- I'm a female impersonator.

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2 Comments
 

Male: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put I and U togather

Female: Oh really, because if I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put F and U
together.

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5 Comments
 

Anti-Pickup Line

A collection of responses to pickup lines, and just bad ones in general!

The Anti Joke Book




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Quotes From Other Sites

  • “on the porsche 911 this is ridiculous , me liking this is like gordon brown going to the polling booth and saying " do you....”

    via: Clarksonisms

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    via: Pointless Inventions

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    via: Pointless Super Powers

  • “My hoodie/jacket strings HAVE to be equal in length, or I pull them then restretch the hood out to make them even..”

    via: Things You Think Only You Do

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